I’m reflecting on this past year - 2021. And I wanted to share that I. AM. GRATEFUL.
What happened this year for me (and really the past several years) was equal parts crazy, wonderful, exciting, depressing, emotionally draining followed by uplifting, and so much more. Let me just say... things have changed! And all for the better...
In January, I started off the year with so much hope for the future. I knew my family was preparing for a big move from Pittsburgh to Chicago. I was ready to move, because I knew it was a move toward stability, which I desperately needed after years of geographical and occupational upheaval. Orthopedic fellowship was always in my professional plan, so I just decided to jump in, knowing it would be hard with all the upcoming transitions. I had made it through craziness in the past, so I thought this would be no different. A few months after I committed to fellowship, however, I realized that my chronically unstable shoulder wasn't going to recover, no matter how much strengthening I was doing. It was getting worse, to the point where I literally had to keep my hand in my pocket to make it feel like my shoulder wasn't falling out. So 3 months after I started fellowship, I sold my Pittsburgh practice and went to the OR for stabilization.
As a PT who educated post-op patients on a frequent basis, I VASTLY underestimated the toll this would take on me. Do you know how hard it is to do your hair (or anything!) with 1 arm? My husband never quite mastered the ponytail but I love him for trying!
We found our dream home on March 17, which was the day it came on the market. We got in for a look, knew it was the one, and immediately put in an offer. The luck of the Irish must have been with us, because they accepted our offer, even with other offers! We moved to Chicago over memorial day weekend and found ourselves in a perfect neighborhood, full of friendly faces, young families, and a mess full of kids for our boys to play with. Lucky, again. Then, after fully intending on starting my own practice again, a seemingly perfect part time job sort of fell into my lap. A position that I thought would allow me to dual-tackle my clinical AND education career. Luck. Yet again!
Well. That's the thing about luck... its bound to run out! After explicitly asking about productivity requirements in my interview (and being told 1 thing which was acceptable to me), this clinic decided they weren't happy with my dedication to providing top value care, ie. the best care with the best outcomes in the lowest # of visits. They wanted me to see my patients 3x/week for 14-16 visits, which is an abominable (and fraudulent) request of a healthcare employer. They fired me without warning or conversation 5 weeks after hire. This full story is for another time, but this ultimately led to my decision to withdraw from fellowship... and from clinical practice altogether (for now, at least).
I spent a month sulking. Really. Sulking. Not having a direction or purpose. I didn't know how to not be clinical. I was (am) afraid of losing my skills, losing my relevance, losing everything I have worked for. I was also struggling at home. My sons were having a really hard time adjusting to a new place and this weighed heavy on my heart every day and sleepless night. All this, while trying to rehab my shoulder, settle into a new house (and state...), and find my path. I struggled hard. But I made a deliberate choice every day not to struggle alone. I talked and dealt when I didn't want to. My husband was my absolute rock. And my psychologist, a close second.
And then. I finally decided to take this opportunity to go "all-in" and capitalize on several projects I had been working on for a long time - CE accreditation for PT providers and PT Primary Care curriculum. I spent every working hour in emails, phone calls, flowcharts, process maps, legal review, pricing optimization, future projections, more ideas, process maps, charts, tables, opinions... and more ideas. I pared down my company's educational offerings to JUST the stuff I knew I was passionate about and could go the mile - primary care & imaging and launched the RHE-Cert program. I knew, "this is it"... I closed out 2021 in a COMPLETELY different place (literally and figuratively!) than I was going in.
I never imagined that I would be here - a small business owner (offering services of which I
never really intended), not in clinical practice (at the moment, at least),
fellowship drop-out (probably for the best), loving the flexibility and chill nature of working from home, raising 2 young boys with an amazing husband by my side, with nothing but good vibes for the future. I am enjoying being able to use my creativity to develop impactful programs & changes within my profession and beyond, clearly something that is greatly needed after what I experienced this year.
I finally feel good, here and now. That's my mantra for 2022 - all-in, here and now. Hopeful. Motivated. & Adaptable for whatever comes my way.
In 2022, RHE has a lot of exciting new programs coming your way - a re-brand is in near sight. RHE-Cert will become its own distinct entity, with more affordable and equitable CE approval options for PT educators, as well as marketing options and free curriculum-development resources. In addition to enhancing our PT primary care and MSK imaging education offerings, RHE will continue its team-based care project, where I visit and report on health systems that have implemented team-based care in a variety of settings - all in an effort to facilitate much-needed change in the primary care space. Stay tuned and stay subscribed for all the goodness...